This what my “relaxing-I-have-no-plan” weekend turned into. Oops

these puppies are exactly how i felt trying to get out of bed this morning! lesson learned: need to better plan my allergy medicine in relation to how much time i have to sleep it off overnight…!

 via tallgirltales

(Source: aplacetolovedogs)

for someone who is terrible at budgeting money, i am superfly at budgeting my weightwatchers points.  i just made a delicious, filling lunch for only 5 points. all fruits and veggies are “free” so i load up on those, adding in turkey breast and chick peas for protein and cheddar rice cakes for sanity (for the love of chips, yall) and voila! 5 points. 

oh and diet coke. because, well, let’s just be real. i still have to function.

combine that with the activity points i earned for walking the neighbor’s dog and i’m feeling pretty spectacular about my choices. what a nice feeling and a welcome change.

i’m also reading weight loss boss, the book by the weight watchers ceo, because, well i love to read things on my kindle and figured it would be a good kick in the ass to stay on the program. and i love it! he’s very real (he’s a member and has lost weight with WW) and sometimes i feel literally like he’s speaking directly to me. 

one of my biggest things with food is that there was a level of deprivation growing up. we weren’t poor, but my family was very frugal and my mom kept us healthy by limiting things.  well, when i got to high school and college and beyond, i went a little hog wild with my visa over doritos and name brand ice cream.  and i eat a lot in secret because growing up if i wanted more, i felt like i had to sneak it.  and calories don’t count if you eat them in the kitchen with the lights off at 1am or in your bed, right? wrong. they stick double because you’re inhaling m&ms hours after your metabolism has gone to beddie-bye.

so it’s baby steps. and i’m trying. and the best part?? i’m succeeding! i feel better. i know i look better. i’m getting more confidence in myself and know that i can do this. i can change my life.

i’m lighter.  by nine pounds, thanks to weight watchers.  yes there is a slight uptick from this past weekend of bachelorette debauchery, but i’m back on track and know that little line will continue to go down.

it’s hard. it takes planning. and will power.  but after adhering to the plan for three weeks, seeing the results and more importantly, feeling the results, its getting easier.  when i was away this weekend, eating and drinking anything i wanted, it caught up with me and i felt so, so sick.  it’s crazy to think that four short weeks ago, every day was like that.

and to make sure i stick with it, here are some of my goals and things i want out of this:

• i want to feel better.  i want to feel better because i look better, am healthier and don’t feel sick and tired all the time.
• i don’t want to be afraid of things because i’m so overweight and know i can’t do them.
• i don’t want to be embarrassed sitting in an airplane seat when i watch the person next to me (who in my mind is the same size i am) pull their belt and have 8 inches of slack, while i only have 1 or 2.
• i don’t want to have to wonder what clothes are going to fit as i’m planning my next business trip and have things in my closet that i’m sure will “fit again soon” or “shrunk in the dryer”
• i want to weigh less than 200 pounds by the time i go to my high school reunion.
• i want to wear clothes with zippers.
• i don’t want every day to be the heaviest i’ve ever been.
• i don’t want to be shocked every time i see a picture of myself and blame it on a bad angle, when really, that’s just how my face looks.

so there’s what i want.  and i’m willing to do the work to get it done.  so far, i’ve only been doing points, i have not added any exercise to my efforts. i know that exercise is a key part of continuing weight loss and one day, helping with maintenance, but for now, i’ve been trying to change things slowly, so i feel more confident the changes will stick.

i can do this. i know i can, because i already am. i will never be that heavy again.

Just attempted downloading an app to my phone so hopefully I can get back in the swing of things on here! I know both of my readers must be sorely missing my wit & wisdom on the internets.

Amy Poehler went to Boston College and Jimmy Fallon is my secret boyfriend.

Instant reblog.

emilyinternet:

liligolightly:

asweetbeginning:

love

POEHLER GETS US.

i think this is just the best.

(Source: lipgallagher)

oh man oh man oh man!

so much has been going on, i’ve barely had time to catch up on dvr’d episodes of smash. but when it comes down to deciding between sleep and debra messing, you know what i pick. too bad blogging couldn’t fit in there somewhere.

so what have i been up to?

oh, just traveling for work. to four states in four weeks. for our biggest meetings of the year with each of our clients.

and easter.

and a retreat.

and hosting wedding showers on the weekends in between. in multiple states. and driving millions of miles in my poor car that is so desperately overdue for an oil change.

there was one in boston for my beloved college roommate, kate. i even brought my awkward hand.

and then we crashed surprised her in yonkers at her family shower

so much cake and cardigans in my life right now.

and i’m off to indiana tomorrow for a bachelorette/wedding shower weekend for my best friend from high school, megan. (and i should absolutely be working on the million projects i have to finish before i get on a plane at 7pm tomorrow, but alas, here i sit)

throw in two out of state work trips and the busiest season of work for me and it is safe to say i’m almost plum tuckered out. work is going pretty well, but the truth is i’m itching to be doing something else. somewhere else.

the lease is up on our apartment on august 1st and i think i’m going to move home to indiana. it’s crazy to say that out loud. or at least on the internet to the negative four people who read this blog. i’m 99% sure i can keep my job and continue to work from home in indiana, but i haven’t told my boss yet. the truth is, this is a stepping stone for me to hopefully move to haiti and work and serve there and i know she knows that. i’m ready for it and am so frustrated at times over the glacial pace at which my efforts to move there seem to be going.  i’m heading down for another trip with soles4souls in two weeks and my heart needs it. i need to be down there, to love on those babies, to feel that energy and get reinvigorated with the spirit that has called me to move there.

i need to be there with my dad and have him experience it and tell me that my reaction, my connection, my desire to move there isn’t normal. that what i’m feeling is right and specific. to help validate what my heart is saying.

there is a song i’m listening to on repeat right now, i then shall live, by the gaither vocal band.  do you know it?

<iframe width=”420” height=”315” src=”http://www.youtube.com/embed/cxyBMQJuTuc” frameborder=”0” allowfullscreen></iframe> 

go take a listen. the last few lines have really stuck with me lately

Your kingdom come around and through and in me
Your power and glory let them shine through me
Your Hallowed name, oh may I bear with honor
And may Your living Kingdom come in me
The Bread of Life, O’ may I share with honor
And may You feed a hungry world through me

and that’s really what i want. to feed a hungry world. to be part of the living kingdom. to bring the incredible light of christ to those babies in haiti. showing them His love. knowing that i am acting as His hands & feet on this earth.

so it’s a slow process.  baby steps.

start by wrapping up my life here in boston. 

move to indiana. be with my family. work to find the inner peace and strength to prepare for the third world.

move to haiti. fall in love. stay in love. let it decide everything.

sounds pretty easy when i write it out like that. 

it has become glaringly obvious in my life that i need more discipline.

with regard to what i eat, how much i sleep, getting exercise, reading the Word, all the way down to making sure i brush my teeth twice a day and use mouthwash too.

and i’m using easter as a chance to start fresh.  i’m not making resolutions. and for right now, i don’t have any tangible goal (i know, i know: big mistake).  but i’m keeping track of what i can do, what i have done and what my goal is for tomorrow.

last night-i washed my face, brushed my teeth and went to bed at a reasonable hour, while not watching tv.

baby steps.

today i woke up, put on a bra, brushed my teeth before noon (working from home has wreaked havoc on my personal hygiene and discipline. seriously. gross.), drank tea instead of coffee and at four servings of fruits & veggies, while drinking liters of water and doing 60 second bursts of jumping jacks in between conference calls (really glad i was wearing the bra at this point).

then i went to chipotle for dinner and had barbacoa tacos with sour cream and diet coke.

baby steps.

(this may or may not have been the header on an online dating profile i only recently shut off)

moving on.

so, let’s be real. we all have one.  the ‘catch all’ laundry basket that fills up slowly (and gets emptied even more slowly).  it sits innocently enough in your laundry room. perhaps it even lives under a table, so as not to draw attention to itself (what  sweet and demure, catch all laundry basket!).  it gets filled with the extra sweatshirt that there isn’t quite room for in the last load of wash.  or for your less than favorite table cloth.  or the random sock that fell on the floor after getting washed and needs to be put through the spin cycle again.*

*this might only apply to people who, like me, do their laundry in a disgusting, unfinished basement whose floor is so gross, that a sock falling on it truly requires another wash.

tonight, i had a few items left over from this weekend’s laundry. and even when i ran (literally. excuse the huffing and puffing while i type this) upstairs to grab my bathroom towels and all of the kitchen towels to fill out the load, i still had room. 

so i tentatively reached into the catch all basket. and found a sweatshirt.

and a sock.

and a tablecloth.

and my summer suit.

not a bathing suit. a business suit. that i paid good money for. but is seasonal, so i can only wear it in the summer (or sometimes an early spring or late fall, but i digress). apparently. in all of my grown up ability to take care of my nice things, like work clothes that were purchased for specific occasions and seasons, i stuffed this suit in the catch all basket at the end of last summer (or maybe it was early fall), deciding i’d wash and dryell it later.

(is there a more perfect time to do laundry than later? i think not)

well, it has been in a sad, forgotten, crumpled heap for at least nine months.  and travel season for work is upon me.  and it’s spring. so i have a need for the suit again. let’s see how good my generic dryell refills really are.  because it would be simply smashing if i could avoid a trip to the dry cleaners to correct the lazy mistake i made last summer by cramming this into the catch all basket and forgetting it was there.

oops.